Crystal Palace fans are not happy with the new kits for 2016/17

Written by Robert Sutherland

Palace's awards night was one of laughs and entertainment - but as is typically the case, there was room for some controversy. This time, it was because of the kits. 

Crystal Palace. Synonymous the colours blue and red. And an Eagle. And passionate support. But also, stripes. 

We love our stripes. A lot of our fans are deeply passionate about them. Some even heckle the chairman about them.

They're simple to execute and easy to spot - red, blue, red, blue, red, blue. And a bit more red, and maybe a bit more blue. 

But seemingly, Palace missed that memo. According to Steve Parish, there's only so much you can do with stripes - so for next season, Palace have done away with them entirely. Gone are alternating colours, here is a big, blue block right down the middle of the strip. it's essentially an Ajax kit with different colours. Or you could call it one big, fat, blue stripe.


Personal opinion: as far as the shirt is concerned, I actually like it. For any other team, I think I'd find it an interesting concept. I didn't mind the half-and-half strip we had in our first Premier League season, though - so clearly my opinion is invalid.

However, in this case, the one thing I would say is that I can't see myself wearing it. I've seen myself in each of our previous four home shirts - which is why I've owned them all - but I just don't get that sense with this iteration. I won't own this one. 


That said, Palace haven't let the club's fans down entirely. The away shirt, a sash with a yellow backdrop rather than the black one we had a few years ago, is a thing of beauty. It's bright, vibrant and different - yet harks back to the sashes of old. 

The away shirt shows that a simple, modern twist on an old classic can work. The home shirt tries just a bit too hard. 

What do you think of the designs? Comment below!

This is the exact percentage chance Crystal Palace have of getting relegated

Written by Jim Daly

There are only eight games left and Palace fans are peering perilously over their shoulders at the Premier League relegation zone.

Going into 2016 the Eagles were flying and sat in fifth but after a run of THIRTEETN games without a win they are now just seven points above the drop.

But saving them are the face there are four teams way worse off than Alan Pardew's men, although if this terrible run continues surely things will get worse before they get better.

But this data released by Twitter user @cchappas should bring some comfort to Palace fans.

Because according to those in the know, the Eagles have just a 3% chance of going down.


There is a real chance Palace could stay up without winning another league game in 2016.

AND they have a seriously good chance of actually winning the FA Cup.

What an odd season this is!

Palace boss Pardew not happy with Gayle's red card vs West Ham

Written by Robert Sutherland

Alan Pardew reckons Dwight Gayles dismissal against West Ham on Satruday ruined the game as a contest.

Gayle was sent off just bfore half time for two yellow cards; both for late lunges at Hammers players.

The second seemed harsh, bearing in mind it was Gayle's second tackle all afternoon, and West Ham midfielder Cheikhou Kouyaté made a meal of it.

Regardless Gayle was dismissed by referee Mark Clattenburg and Pardew was not happy.

“The first challenge from Dwight was bad and was a yellow card,” said Pardew after the gme.

“But the second, he’s missed the ball by about a centimetre. Perhaps he shouldn’t have made the challenge, and he will have to learn from that, but I still think the referee was hasty.

“I said to the referee at half-time ‘did it really warrant that’? Perhaps if he’d taken a couple of seconds after the tackle he might have given him a final warning. I thought the game deserved that.

“It kind of knocked the occasion – although not for West Ham, because it played into their hands.”

Palace defender Scott Dann believed Gayle put himself in a dangerous position with the challenges but was perhaps unlucky to go.

He said to the South London Press: “Dwight will learn. When you look at it again you think he does not need to make that challenge, but these things happen. He wants to do well.

“He has got a run in the team after not playing much this season and he wants to impress - a bit too much enthusiasm I would probably say. It looked one that he could have got away with, but when you are on a yellow card you always run the risk.

“For the first 30 minutes when we had 11 men, we were probably not in control of the game and they were the better team.”

Dear Big Sam - An open letter to the West Ham manager

Written by Andy Street

Dear Sam,

It was with some interest that we, at Five Year Plan Fanzine, read your protracted attacks on Dougie Freedman in the wake of his post-match comments after the recent 2-2 draw between your West Ham side and Crystal Palace at Selhurst Park.  Whilst many Palace fans have resorted to pure vitriol in the wake of your somewhat inane ramblings on the West Ham Official Website and in the Evening Standard, we would merely like to extend a cordial hand of sympathy and friendship.

After all, given your assertions that you would find it easy to manage the likes of Real Madrid and Manchester United, it must be quite some shock to find yourself working in the Championship. That must be tough, particularly having spent the GDP of a small eastern European nation on the wages of John Carew and Manuel Almunia, and having a difficult board of directors who are hellbent on returning to the Premier League at the first attempt. 

We also know that West Ham fans can be a demanding lot, and on that front we genuinely feel for you. It must be difficult, having been sacked from your last two managerial roles at Newcastle and Blackburn in fairly humiliating circumstances, and having lost your column at the now defunct News of the World, to find yourself having to deal with a set of fans who still like to remind everyone that they won the World Cup and are the self-appointed Academy of Football. 

That you have already lost two games at home with a large proportion of the crowd on your back before you’ve even had a chance to tuck into your advent calendars can’t be nice.  Admittedly you have a Premier League level squad, which should comfortably win this league, and have already spent exorbitant amounts of money in adding to it, but it can’t be easy to get through your methods and objectives to some of those stars when you are clearly on a downward trajectory in your career and have been widely denigrated, derided and disliked by fans of your last two clubs.

In these circumstances, it’s utterly understandable that you would try to shift attention elsewhere. Frankly, we would try to do the same thing.  It also makes complete sense to attempt to attack a younger manager in doing so, since they would usually not bite back quite so quickly and particularly given that you no longer have the backing of Sir Alex Ferguson, such is his lack of interest in the lower leagues. Whilst many would say you have a responsibility as a senior figure at the LMA to encourage, rather than disparage, a bright young manager, we have to applaud you for using a position of power for your own benefit.  After all, number one always has to come first, and we would be the first to say that with great power comes great opportunity to sort out oneself – bravo.

It is, therefore, with great pleasure that we wish to offer you this free t-shirt courtesy of the Crystal Palace fans, as a sort of retirement present, since you probably won’t last the season at Upton Park, and will probably find it incredibly difficult having been sacked from three consecutive jobs to find work thereafter. We, at FYP, always wish to demonstrate historical awareness, and we realise that managers of your ilk represent a bygone era, which is very much an integral part of English footballing history and which should at no cost be forgotten.  We want to thank you, as without managers, and indeed characters, like you we would not remember quite so readily why percentages football which predominantly involves fighting for the second ball from a big front man is of the past, and why young managers like Dougie Freedman, who attempt to impose a passing style upon their players and bring through young stars, are of the future.

Moreover, when the inevitable happens and the trigger-happy board bow to the demands of the Boleyn faithful in showing you the door, we would also like, given your love of supporting arguments with data and percentages, to offer you the role of FYP’s Official Statistician.  We will, of course, be building the arguments ourselves, since your recent columns have shown demonstrable proof that your interpretation of raw data could do with some improvement, but we feel that it would provide you with a lucrative and rewarding future career path after football management.

Finally, best of luck for the rest of the season, or at least until your P45 arrives in the post – you’re probably going to need it.

Yours Faithfully,

Five Year Plan Fanzine


Crystal Palace sign Belgian teenage starlet once targeted by Arsenal

Written by Robert Sutherland

Palace have signed Belgian teenage starlet Jason Lokilo from Anderlecht.

Lokilo is 17 had been watched by Arsenal but has been snapped up by the Eagles after training with the club since the summer.

After waiting for international clearance, Palace have been able to announce the signing of Lokilo - and the youngster is ready to try and break into the U21 side.

"I used to watch interviews with Cristiano Ronaldo, I'm a big fan," he told Palace's official website. "I hope to work on my English, to play with the under-21s and maybe sometimes the under-18s, let's see!"

He added: "I'm very happy to have signed with Crystal Palace," he said. "It's a good club making progress.

"They bought Cabaye, who is a very good player. [And I like] Bolasie, Zaha, Puncheon, it's a very good [place] for wingers!

"I've trained very well and I'm looking to continue that."

An attacking player, Lokilo joins a host of young wingers and forwards being developed in Palace's youth sides.

"I'm a right winger, but I can play anywhere," he said. "I like to pass the ball and get assists. I'm left-footed, so I like to cut inside to create chances to score."

Lokilo reportedly left Anderlecht in the summer after a contract row with their management.

He spent some time on trial with Arsenal with the Gunners keen to sign him, but Palace have beaten them to his signature.

Will we see him in the first team anytime soon? Probably not but he's certainly one to look out for.